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6/28/10

We Made It!

Fawn left Sunday morning, continuing on her fiftieth birthday journey. I'm happy to report that there was no introvert melt down on my part. YAY!

It helped that we've spent weeks together before, so she's had the heads up on the nose dive I can take when traveling or spending lots of time with someone. Not nose dive as in depressed, but going internal (translation for extroverts: quiet) because that's how we process information.

What comes to mind for me is a whale showing its flukes, meaning they're diving down deep and will be gone for awhile. I wish I had such a clear signal.


A few years ago, while spending five days with a friend I'd had zero contact with for the previous twenty five years, I had a massive melt down and employed a gesture so horrifyingly juvenile it astounds me to this day.

I flipped her off.

That's right. Flipped her off in a crowded food court. Awesome, huh? (Honestly, how second grade was that?!)

Note to self: This can be what happens when down time is not had.

I had not yet come to grips with my introvertedness and by the time I realized what was needed, the downward spiral had started and presto! it was too late.

Actually, it was rather effective at getting me alone time. But not in a good way. Go figure, the melt down and ensuing gesture damaged our friendship.

It also made me nervous about seeing people and/or traveling. "There's no telling what she'll do!" "Will resort to ten year old behavior!" "Able to irreparably damage friendships with a single finger!"

Extroverts don't usually have a clue about how much down time Innies need, sometimes even we don't (see above). We need to be alone and quiet to recharge our "batteries".(extroverts recharge by being WITH people)
We can be adaptable though. An hour reading at another table here, a few minutes alone in the morning/evening there; that time helps us be the charming friend you remember.

Google "how to travel with introverts" for some interesting articles.

4 comments:

  1. Oh wow. I totally, totally get that. In fact, I run best on ten hours alone everyday. Wild, huh? And I do have problems when we have guests for days, but as you said, I can usually adapt if I can get intermittent moments alone with a book and coffee and myself and God.

    I love finding other Innies! :) Thanks for sharing, Kim. Blessings, Debra

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  2. The whale/flukes thing is a clear signal, but it sounds like your signal couldn't have been much clearer...okay, not a great PRE-warning, but how satisfying that must have been -- and it makes a great cautionary tale forever after! Good one!! (Uh, Anonymous can't figure out the URL thing, this is CP)

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  4. Oh, now I do CP. :-)

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